Today's Reading
His eyes grow wide. "Oh my god." His gaze bounces between me and the ring. "We actually got married? That...that was real?"
We stare at each other for a moment, both of us processing the shock as the news settles in. A vague memory of me wearing a scratchy white veil floats through my brain. It was attached to some kind of firm plastic headband, and I remember it really hurt my ears. I rub one of them absently, though there's only a bit of dull pain now. Nikhil was standing in front of me, I think. I don't remember what he was wearing. This foggy image appearing in my mind could easily have been just part of a dream, if not for the ring I'm still grasping tight in my hand.
And then...Nikhil does the strangest thing imaginable.
He laughs, all bright and sunny and deep. It sparks something within me, and suddenly, I can't help but laugh in return.
"We're married," he says.
"Yeah."
"You're my wife." Wonder rings loud and clear in his voice and it washes over me like sunlight. It warms me, scattering the dark and anxious feelings I had moments before.
I'm somebody's wife. I'm Nikhil's wife.
I don't fully know how I feel about that yet. But the idea doesn't sound as scary as it did when I first woke up.
He watches me, hesitation creeping through his expression. "Are you... are you okay?"
"Yeah," I say, surprised to hear myself say it. Surprised that I mean it. "Yeah. I think I am."
He draws me closer, his arms coming around me, his forehead resting against mine. We stay like that for a while until my entire body relaxes, leaning into his.
"I love you, Meena," he says, and my heart jumps at the words. It's not the first time he's said them, but it still feels unreal. I don't think I've fully wrapped my mind around it. That this kind and patient and wonderful man actually loves me.
"I know this is fast," he continues. "And it's not something we planned. And I know how you like your plans."
I laugh, and he leans back to watch, grinning in return.
"But I'm in this. I'm in this with you. Whether there's a signed piece of paper or not. We can get rid of it. We can rip it up and file the proper stuff and go back to the way we were. Or we can keep it. I don't care. None of that changes anything for me. You're it. You're it for me. I'm here. And I'm yours. For as long as you want me."
Something clicks in this moment. Something right and sure slides into place. I want Nikhil. I won't ever stop wanting Nikhil. I won't ever stop wanting to be around him. Whether there's a piece of paper or not.
"You're it for me too," I whisper back.
A bit of hair slips in front of my face, and Nikhil reaches out, tucking it behind my ear.
"I'm guessing we made vows," he says. "But I don't remember any of them. And I don't remember most of the traditional ones either, but I want to make some now." He takes a deep breath, his face growing solemn and tender.
"Meenakshi Nader, I promise to be there for you."
"And I promise to be there for you."
He pauses. "You don't have to—"
"I want to." I want to promise this man everything he's promising me. I want to show him that I mean it. That we may have entered this whole thing accidentally, but I'm choosing to stay in it. I'm choosing him.
"Okay." His hand finds mine, his thumb rubbing over my palm. "What's mine is yours," he continues.
"What's mine is yours."
"In sickness and health, and rain and shine, and bad times and good. I promise to share all of it with you. All of it. For better or worse."
...
